Traditions gain meaning from repetition, even when they’re a bit silly. So, as we wrap up the year, we’re back with our annual Skateboarding Superlatives to celebrate the inane, dangerous, and downright embarrassing behavior we all secretly love. Consider this the third installment, following our previous lists from year one and year two. We’ve put a lot of thought into who to celebrate, shame, and reprimand, and hope we haven’t missed anyone deserving. While you might not agree with all of our choices, or even understand them (Ishod, we’re still holding onto your “2017 Hardest Nipples” trophy), this is all in good fun, and the slate is clean to be defiled anew next year. Let’s get to it!
Biggest Tease
Mark Suciu
Mark Suciu skateboarding
Mark Suciu takes the award for “Biggest Tease”. His skating is so good that he’s always teasing us with what could be.
Best Personality Substitution
Cali Sober
Neen Williams Cali Sober
Cali Sober wins “Best Personality Substitution.” It seems like a whole new character has emerged.
Best Doubles
The Penetration Cruiser
The Penetration Cruiser skateboarding
“Best Doubles” goes to The Penetration Cruiser, for their unforgettable tandem skating antics.
Most Likely to Get Lost at a Gas Station
Kevin Bradley
Kevin Bradley skateboarding
Kevin Bradley is crowned “Most Likely to Get Lost at a Gas Station.” Let’s hope he carries a map.
Most Likely to End Up in White Collar Prison
Mikey Taylor
“You’ll never be responsible with a lot, if you aren’t responsible with little.”
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Learn as much as you can about about money when you don’t have it, so when you do have it, you know what to do! .
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Prepare to succeed.
THE TIME IS NOW
@communecapital @stevenkarkenny pic.twitter.com/iWpABDsCZ8— Mikey Taylor (@Mikey_Tay1or) March 15, 2019
Mikey Taylor receives “Most Likely to End Up in White Collar Prison”. His financial literacy tweets raised a few eyebrows.
Biggest Cans
Tyshawn
Tyshawn skateboarding
Tyshawn wins “Biggest Cans”. His abilities on a skateboard are simply unmatched.
Longest Belt
Sammy Baca
Sammy Baca wearing a long belt
Sammy Baca’s belt earns him the “Longest Belt” award. It’s a fashion statement that makes its own rules.
Youngest Youth
Rayssa Leal
Rayssa Leal skateboarding
Rayssa Leal is the obvious choice for “Youngest Youth.” Her talent at such a young age is truly inspiring.
Most Cells
P-Rod
Paul Rodriguez skateboarding
P-Rod is honored with “Most Cells.” His longevity and consistency in the skateboarding world are noteworthy.
We hope you’ve enjoyed our third annual Skateboarding Superlatives. Whether you agree or disagree, we look forward to doing this all again next year. Until then, keep pushing!
Illustration by: Michael Giurato
