Chewy Cannon stands out in the skateboarding world. While some skaters chase fame and fortune, Chewy seems to be carving his own path, fueled by weed and a unique perspective on life. He’s not just another sponsored skater; he’s a character, and skateboarding thrives on these personalities. Even if Palace boards are a little too hip, Chewy Cannon’s skating and interviews are always worth paying attention to.
Chewy Cannon skating in London
Before this interview, I knew Chewy Cannon liked weed and had a reputation for fast, slurred British slang. It turns out there’s a lot more to him. Despite his flashy sponsors, he has a humble past, growing up in a small British resort town. He dropped out of school as a teen, selling weed and working odd jobs to travel and connect with other skaters.
What’s the story behind your name, Chewy?
It’s a nickname. My real name is Louis. There was this old Drifter chocolate bar advert that mentioned “Chewy Louie.” One of my friend’s dads said, “Come on, Chewy Louie,” and it just stuck. When I started skating, someone introduced me as Chewy, and that became my skateboarding name.
Do you get tired of the Chewbacca comparisons?
That’s what everyone does. They hear “Chewy” and immediately make the Chewbacca noise. Then they ask me to do it. I always tell them, “No, I don’t fucking do it, mate.”
How can you tell the difference between British and Australian accents?
We don’t say “good day.” But where I’m from, the accent has a bit of a twang, so I get mistaken for Australian all the time. Even English people ask. The “mate” thing confuses people. I’m a proper English gentleman, not a fucking Aussie.
Does it bother you when people think you’re Australian?
Nah, they just stole some potatoes and got banished to a luxurious island. Can’t really blame them. I wish my family had stolen some potatoes. But if someone asked if I was Aboriginal? Nah, you’re trippin cuz.
Why would being mistaken for Aboriginal be so bad?
It’d be hard to mistake me for one, because I’m white. But it’s not that I wouldn’t want to be. They’ve had a rough go of it, with white folks messing up their country.
Chewy Cannon performing a trick
Does skateboarding cover all your expenses?
Yeah, it’s been good to me for a while now. I’ve been traveling the world in nice clothing, so I’m happy. I don’t own a house or anything, but it’s been a good job for a long time.
You’re 34, but still in the middle of your career. What allows skaters to have such long careers these days?
There’s more money in it now, which creates opportunities to live off it longer. No one knows how long you can skate. Tony Hawk can still do a 900. If you stay fit, you can find new ways to keep being a pro. Biebel will probably skate forever. But if my sponsors don’t think I can skate well anymore, I’ll probably go back to selling weed.
Besides being a sponsored skater, have you had other jobs?
Loads of funny ones. I worked as a bricklayer with my dad when I was young. Harsh in the winters. I’d work with him instead of going to school. I didn’t want to be a bricklayer, so I got factory jobs. Chocolate factory, seafood factory, chicken factory, even a Turkish delight factory. I only had one pair of skate shoes back then. They got covered in sticky Turkish delights, so they’d stick to my board when I tried to skate. Couldn’t do flip tricks properly.
Chewy Cannon doing a nosegrind polejam
What were the other factory jobs like?
I did late nights at a book factory. Total nightmare. It was a massive library, and I’d go to the end of the corridor with a ladder, look up ‘C’ for ‘cannabis’ and read all about weed. I’d sit there for ages, reading about cannabis, coke, mafia, gang wars, anything a bit off-key.
How much weed do you smoke?
Too much, probably. Too much money and lung capacity. But then again, not nearly enough. I’ve got five pots of weed in front of me right now, which makes me happy. OG Rican, Kosher Kush, Triple Cheese, another OG Rican, some Grapefruit, and Mazar Hash, and temple ball hash. It brings me a lot of excitement.
How much weed would you guess you smoke each day?
This is probably going to get me in trouble. Probably three or four grams a day on average. Some days I’ve run through a half ounce of weed easily. At parties or festivals, I can roll ’em up. It’s a bit of a burden sometimes.
Chewy Cannon skating with Blondey McCoy
Will you smoke weed forever, even when you’re 80 or 90?
I’d have to start growing it. Once I get a plot of land, I’ll be on it. Otherwise, I’ll have to get people coming to the nursing home. Can’t see people knocking about the nursing home like, “You wanna draw, blood?” Maybe the youngsters could bring me weed to distribute inside. By then there will be loads of ex-potheads that need weed, and I’ll be bumping around on the zimmer frame with all the Jordyns, dropping fucking dimes.
I used to smoke a lot of weed, but I stopped when I ran out of money.
Well, that’s a good way to quit. You should start growing it to make some money.
I should grow weed?
Yeah, you should start growing it, bro. It’s legal over there now, innit? I’m sure if you grew two plants and sold it for $60 for 3.5 grams…that’s a lot of money.
Is skating more or less difficult when you’re stoned?
It can go either way. I smoke normally, so I’m usually in the same frame of mind. If I go to South Bank, I’ll do my usual shit that I know I can do. If I get really stoned, I don’t try those tricks. I try weird shit and come up with something new. It breaks the monotony. I’ll be like, “Fuck this shit, I can’t do it.” Then I’ll smoke and won’t care anymore, and try something else instead.
Chewy Cannon performing a frontside upslide in London
How did you get into skating?
Back to the Future. That scene where Marty grabs onto the back of the car. That’s when I decided skating was cool. My dad got me a massive fish board, proper ’70s steeze. It was flat with a tail bumper on the bottom. All I did was roll around on my arse. Later, I got one to go to school on. Then they stopped letting me bring my skateboard to school, so I quit school.
Why didn’t they let you bring your board to school?
Because it wouldn’t fit in my locker. I stashed it anyway and then I stopped going, which was pretty stupid.
How old were you when you left school?
Like 15. In England, you finish school when you’re 16. The year before, I basically didn’t go. I wanted to play football, but I didn’t want to go to the rest of the school. My teacher said if I didn’t come to school, I couldn’t be on the football team. I said, “Fuck it. I won’t be on the football team.” So I went and skated every day by myself. I didn’t have any money, so I would bum trains and go wherever. Little shit I was.
So you moved out of your parents’ when you were 15?
I don’t want to give you my life story, but it was dysfunctional. My mom left, and my dad didn’t hold it down too great. I lived with my dad, but he was a bit of a nightmare. My sister was 17 and already living by herself, so I moved in with her. I was like, “Fuck it, I’ll just live wherever.” As long as I ain’t got school anymore, I could skate all day, smoke weed, and chill. And that’s what I did. Then I started selling weed to make money to go to different towns and cities to skate. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have been able to make it.
How did you get sponsored?
There were only about seven skaters in my town, and this one guy started making videos. He sent them into Sidewalk Surfer magazine, and they reviewed one. That’s how I got noticed and got on a shop. I got on Blueprint from that. He used to come to my house to do my homework so we could go skate quicker. I also went out with his sister, so it was a pretty tight group. When Blueprint was finishing up, I moved to Barcelona with an ex-girlfriend. I worked on taxi rickshaws and made quite a bit of money. I’d pick up tourists for bachelor parties, and they’d ask about clubs or how to get this or that. I realized I could make some money. So I’d see them later and give them what they needed, which was obviously bars of soap and stuff, you know what I mean.
Did you ever get caught?
My boss told me he knew what I was doing. He was like, “Why is your phone ringing all the time? The next time you get paid, I’m gonna double your pay so you can pay your rent, but you have to stop doing this shit.” I said I would stop and just skate, and that was the last time I worked. That was eight or nine years ago.
Chewy Cannon performing a switch frontside boardslide transfer
Being on Palace, have you ever seen Lucas Puig’s nuts fall out of his short shorts?
I’ve never seen them, maybe he’s got little nuts. It depends on how big your nuts are. You must have some fucking big old nuts. I’ve got a big dick but little nuts.
Do French men have big or small nuts?
French people probably got big balls because they’re quite funny. They’re like, “We are French, we don’t give a fuck about nothing. We fucking piss on the floor, this is art to us. We have ten glasses of wine. We don’t drink one glass of wine, we’re too liberal. I paint the women all day and my balls are too big so they fall out my shorts.”
To end it, which subway system is worse, London’s or NYC’s?
Fucking London. Some days I get on the tube, and I’m like, “Fuck this shit.” Your tubes are bigger and cooler. Ours are made for midgets. Or dwarfs, or whatever is politically correct for that term.
I don’t know anymore. Is it politically correct to say little person?
Oh right, there you go, I meant to say little people. Either way, I feel bad now.
Do British people do little person tossing?
No, but that sounds fucking sick. I wanna see that. They should spice up the Olympics with some shit like that, ‘cause it’s fucking getting boring. Olympic little person toss off. Who can make a little person cum the fastest, go!
If there was an Olympic competition for jacking off little people, how fast do you think you could jack one of them off?
Am I allowed lube? Can I spit on it? Can I get to know the little person beforehand? Can I stroke his hair, or have I just got to wank? Am I allowed to stroke his balls at the same time?
Yeah, anything goes.
I reckon probably under five minutes if I really got him good.
